Love Languages: Physical Touch

14/10/2021by Terry White

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The love language of physical touch is a non-verbal physical expression of love. It communicates emotion, let’s others know that they’re seen and heard, and maintains connection within relationships. It can convey so much without having to utter a word.


How do you tell who’s love language is physical touch?

When next you find yourself in conversation with friends, family, neighbours, colleagues and others who make up your community take note of who puts their hand on a shoulder, who taps another’s arm as they share a story, who hugs a greeting, who shakes hands, who cups their hands around another’s face. This will give you a hint of who’s primary love language is physical touch.


When do I show affection?

Bubbly, joyful, touchy people don’t seem to need a particular time to express their fondness for others. For them it seems to happen naturally as they speak.

For some, greetings are a joyous moment of arms stretched out ready to embrace another, sometimes even getting their bodies involved in a follow-up shake of the ‘greetee’ before releasing them from the hug.

But for others, it may be more carefully thought out. They may only need to lay a gentle hand on another’s arm or hand to show love and support for that person.


How can I show non-intimate affection?

Well, here are few examples:

  • Hug
  • Sit close
  • Offer a shoulder
  • Touch an arm
  • Squeeze a hand
  • High-five or fist bump


Physical touch in the 21st century

As easily as we can mistake a moment and do or say an inappropriate thing at an inopportune time, for instance, some people giggle nervously when they are scared or feel awkward, so too touches may be offered at an inopportune time, often because we are projecting our own emotions in those situations. Sometimes it is best to actually ask what kind of support someone might want from you first.

However you are touching others or others are touching you, be sure that every person involved is comfortable with this way of demonstrating love. Obviously, we don’t want any touching that would get the #MeToo movement banging on your door.

Remember, you have a voice and asking someone politely not to touch you is your right.

Do the love language quiz here and find out what your primary love language is!

Terry White